Petal Picker

I can admit when I'm wrong and I'll be the first to tell you when I don't have the answers and it's never hard for me to ask advice...but I am the absolute worst at making decisions.  I can never decide where to eat, what I want to do on the weekends, what to wear - but it doesn't bother me until it comes to relationships.  I find a nice guy who's respectable, genuine, a perfect gentleman, and I'll like him for a few weeks and then something happens, and it's on to the next one.  I think that makes me the type of girl that wants what she can't have, right?

Exactly...

He loves me, he loves me not.  That game is ONLY fun if the last petal is the "he loves me" petal and if it's not, well then, pick another flower because surely he loves me.  What if all the flowers I pick never end on the fun petal and what if he really doesn't love me?  I can't rely on picking petals my whole life to help me decide whether to be with someone or not.  So what do I rely on?

What if he's none of the things you thought you wanted but you love him because the things you wanted changed?  Or what if he's treated you poorly in the past but he really makes an effort to change?  What if you're not sure about anything except for the way you feel about him?  Somebody find me a flower with an odd number of petals please!

It's funny, because I never doubt my parent's love, my sister's, grandparent's, or most of my family, and I'm not really sure why.  There are plenty of parents out there that don't love their children and plenty of siblings who hate each other.  So what makes me so certain of their love and why have I never consulted a flower?  I wonder if I could ever get to that point with my significant other...I would never get jealous because I wouldn't question his faithfulness, I really wouldn't have any insecurities because I would be so sure of his loyalty and have no reason to mistrust his love.

Is their any marriage out there like that?  A relationship free of insecurity and doubt...or does everyone trust a flower every now and then?